Antiguarian elevations - March 2025

Guatemala - Central America

En-route to the States to catch up with old friends and family, I decided to make a stop in central America. Having no real reference, I let the flight prices guid me.

The Colonial narrative in South and Central America is a thing. My remarks are based on how a find and feel a place that I visit. No judgements are implied. My truth is what I see and I have come here to Antigua, Guatemala to behold, experience, talk and reflect on the words and stories of locals and expats alike in this beautiful town. 

With a similar elevation to Guatemala City and only 40km away to the west this ancient town lies at the foothills of three vaulted volcanoes. They lean in over the somewhat muddled and sprawling low lying settlement. 

Scruffy cobbled streets where traffic ambles and plays prudent to pedestrians, the aroma of Massa (cornmeal dough) hangs heavy in the air competing with the earthy dust which predominates in the dry summer months. Comals (traditional Guatemalan griddles) litter storefronts and sizzle and crackle.

Above are the Brutalist forms of the Guatemalan regime stamping its authority on a new 'democracy'.

From these Comals Tamales, Chilaquilas and Chuchitos are hawked alongside woven goods and fabrics peddled by colourfully dressed Kaqchikel ladies. Their young children, usually little girls, wander around with baskets of massed produced chocolates and other knick knacks. Their presence in the early evening leaves you to contemplate where they travel from each day to scratch for their meagre prize.

The presence of Colonial legacy is everywhere to see and hear.

The architecture is so evidently Spanish and Baroque and is known locally as Barroco Antigueno. The institutional buildings, parks, churches and cathedral are inspiringly beautiful and timeless. The one-story dwellings and buildings in the central part of town offer similar resemblance but are on a smaller scale and less ornate. Courtyards and Jacaranda shaded areas are commonplace and this is something that the hipster cafes and boutique hotels have leveraged to their advantage.

The Spanish have left their mark so very clearly in the morphed ethnicity of the local Guatemalans. Caucasian features have lengthened the traditional rounded facial aesthetic of Mayan DNA. The Kaqchikel are easily distinguished by their looks and general appearance. Men and women alike, are not particularly tall which leaves your correspondent more than a standard deviation above the mean height. A rare and lofty occurrence indeed.

Antigua - Barroque colonial architecture

As for the language? Undeniably Spanish. But the patois has its own particular meter, vocab and colloquialisms like many destinations in Central and South America. Although fortunate to have a reasonable ear for Latin languages, Spanish sadly, is definitely my Achilles Heel. But Google Translate serves its purpose well when gesticulation and poorly enunciated words fall flat.

Although simple and varied, comidas locales (local food) is very flavourful with the use of fish, vegetables and a variety of meats. 

With a firm foundation around maize (Corn), Chilaquilas, Tamales and Chuchitos are embellished with Recado (red sauce made of Tomato, onion, bell pepper and tomatillos) and meat including chicken, pork or beef.

A hearty soup or stew is a favourite here using all manner of meat and fish as a base. Popular dishes include Pepian de Pollo (Chicken stew), Kak’ik (Turkey stew) and Hilachas (shredded beef stew in Recado sauce).

Any number of postres (desserts) are available to delight those with a sweet tooth.

Closely aligned to food is the subject of hygiene. A topic that you’ll rarely find being spoken about in kitchens at parties. I, too, succumbed to a distressing bout of taveller’s gut here. With an appetite for the adventurous the risks are ever present and one simply needs to be prepared. I won’t dwell on the subject too much but I will share the following… 

“Don’t show up to a gunfight with a knife!” 

With an arsenal of Loperamide, Azithromycin, Ciprofloxacin, Albendazole and Ivermectin you’ll come out on top like Cortés. Although you’ll have commanded over a rout, you’ll be in need of copious amounts of gut florae to get your digestive system back on track.

It’s a busy place and revolves mostly around the tourist trade. I have, quite ironically,  lamented the hordes of tourists which clutter the streets here. But like most poor countries with such jewels, tourism is often seen as the saviour. 

Undoubtedly, tourism’s responsible face has a key role to play but there is always a cost. Balance and sustainability are not concepts often in practice in the shadows of the industry. 

I appreciate that the Western ‘informed’ view is a pious pulpit from which to preach but it is troubling to see local economies so reliant on the proverbial goose. My use of the religious metaphor is quite deliberately as Catholicism permeates the culture here. Although, if I turn to the agnostic discipline of economics the “Tragedy of the Commons’ suitably dictates.

After having quelled my travelling illness I made my way back to Guatemala City. Instead of the classic tourist shuttle, I decide to brave a local ‘Chicken Bus’ or 'Collectivo'. These brightly decorated and ornate modes of transport are akin to the mini-van taxis of Africa - just bigger.

Their imposing frames certainly did not hamper or restrict their movement. Managed by a two man team of a driver and hustling ‘conductor’ these operations are slick and fleet of foot. One can get picked up or dropped off anywhere on the route and the vehicle barely stops when people are boarding or alighting.

After a harrowing bus ride back to Guatemala City, I took a couple of days to unwind and plan my onward journey.

My hairy 'Collectivo' ride from Antigua to GC

The ‘Merica called and, with a newly inaugurated president with a flair for the dramatic and destructive, I was anxious.

There’s a little more to my jittery disposition. I had, until recently, been denied access to the USA. This down to the fact that I had on 2015 travelled to Iran for a trekking holiday.

As a result the American immigration authorities had taken a dim view. It was incumbent on me to apply for a full scale B1/B2 visa which required a in-person interview at a consular office.

Due to waiting times in various countries (UAE - 3 months, UK- 2 months, Canada - 9 months) I was successful in Buenos Aires with a wait time of only a week.

With Visa in passport, next stop was Orlando!